The Story Game

"For not using Colgate brand toothpaste!" As he holds up a tube of toothpaste. "Clean your mouth everyday with..."

"Not now! We're still in show!" Edogog yelled.

"Oh, sorry." The actor said as he backed off "But they are sponsoring us" he pointed out.

Heph rolled his eyes, "Anyway, to this day we remain confused by why I screamed that as soon as I picked up the sword. It meant that I was the chosen one of prophecy number 37" Heph explained.

"Number 37?" Edogog asked.

"Oh yea, there's hundreds of prophecies and legends that have been told throughout the ages, so much so that we had to write a book just to keep track of them" Heph explained.

"Ok, so you had the sword, then what happened?" Edogog asked

"We're not 100 percent sure. Supposedly Vlad attacked us, even though he had no interest in conquering the Elf Kingdom. But this was future Vlad, so I remembered a lesson on time travel I took, and threw future Vlad at past Vlad, who just so happened to be nearby, and they destroyed each other in a massive electrical discharge upon contact." Heph explained.

"But then apparently that was not Vlad at all, and we're still trying to figure out what happened" Pokyrah explained.

"Afterwards, we proceeded to head to the dragon wastelands; apparently I was to tame a dragon, then I would go retrieve some sort of magic wooden boat from a giant's bloodstream" Heph explained.

"And that is where we enter the story" as two more joined the couch.

"The dragons Angel and Flamethrower everyone! Just to clarify, this is their human forms, isn't that right?"

"Oh yes, as much as we'd love to show off our dragon forms, we wouldn't have been able to fit in the studio if we did" ad the audience laughed at that.

"Ok, so our heroes came to meet Flamethrower and Angel; what happened at that point?" Edogog asked.

"Well, they started to attack us, but we held our ground. We weren't going to let any bloodthirsty dragons get the best of uOUCH!"
Angel had just hit him on the head. "That did not happen!" she said. "Tell the real story!"
Pokyrah rubbed his head, and Flamethrower explained what happened next.

"Well, they had to prove their worth to us, and after a brief conflict, they proved worthy of us and we joined his party. Now Heph had his dragons, and we had a purpose in this world." Flamethrower explained.

"And this is the part where WE enter the story" Edogog said excitedly. "At this point, scouts from our organization had discovered all that happened, and the KNUCKLEHEADS had to take action immediately, for Vlad and Elmo were in cahoots and ready to strike, so we needed to attack first." Edogog explained. Then he gestured to just off stage "Are we ready now?" he asked into the microphone; the producer nodded. "Ok, now we can bring him out, here he is, the leader of Coordinated United Terrifying Evildoers Supreme, Vladimir Tilapia!" Edogog said.

"Vladimir Titannica!" He said as he walked in, now embarrassed.

"Don't look at me, it's what's on the cue card" Edogog said as he pointed just off stage to the stage hand holding the giant cue card.

Vlad walked over, and torched the cue card.
"You still realize I'm trying to kill you, right?" he said to Heph.

"Hey!  No killing during the mid-season recap!"  A producer called from off screen "or we will write you out of the Story Vlad" he warned.

So Vlad sat down as the recap continued.

"Well, eventually what happened was the KNUCKLEHEADS and CUTIES met in combat, with the heroes siding with the knuckleheads.  In a surprising twist, Elmo was killed in battle." Nikko explained.

"And here's the clip" Edogog said.

To our Heros surprise, Vlad was the one wielding the blade as Elmo was struck dead.

The audience gasped.

"Wow, what a twist; Vlad, why would you kill your co-conspirator and friend?" Edogog asked.

"You still don't realize, do you...?"
(Vlad is the most evil person on earth; all he cares for is power.)

"His triumph was very short lived though" Edogog pointed out. "For the very next day, this happened:" and the clip began.

"It's over Vlad... You're surrounded by Knuckleheads!!"

Vlad redied his blade... But then, the unbelievable

The spirit of Elmo, his closest friend and ally appeared, chanting "traitor...traitor...TRAITOR!!" Over and over. Vlad was terrified.

"No, you're dead! I...i..." But the next thing he knew, his very soul was pulled out of his body by Elmo, bringing them both to the underworld

At the end of the clip Edogog spoke again "And thus Vlad was pulled to the very center of Hell; frozen up to his neck in a frozen lake, the fate of all those who betray their brethren" Edogog explained.

"So what was going on with you at the time Heph?" Edogog asked, shifting the focus.

"Well, I..."
"Sorry folks, but we're going to have to take a quick break now. Stay tuned for more soon!"

----------------
When you want to save money on car insurance, you switch to Geico.

A lemming crawled to the top of Mount Everest. "I made it!" Then he ran off the side.

"When you're a lemming, you jump off cliffs. It's what you do. When you want to save 15% or more on car insurance, you switch to Geico. It's what you do."

________

We now return to the TSG halftime show.

"Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen, to more of ourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.."
*Falls over*
"What happened?"
"This is what happened: it's a tranquilizer dart!"
"But who would do such a thing?"
Vlad smirked, and pressed the button as he walked out the door.

KABOOM!!

And then the screen paused as the audience applauded

"And that ladies and gentlemen is what would've happened, if we hadn't accounted for Vlad possibly doing something while the show was on.  Every time he tried to attack us, he gets a 500,000 volt shock courtesy a special chip we put under his skin."

"What!?  Why you little..." And Vlad tried to go after Edogog, only to get a massive shock and lose consciousness.

"Where were we?  Ah, yes.  Heph, so Vlad had just been defeated, what was your next quest?" Edogog asked.

Heph clutched his stomach. "You realize I haven't eaten for three days? I'm starving right here!" And he walked off to get a sandwich.

Heph came walking in, fuming.  "I had steak and eggs for breakfast!  Who made me do that?!"

A nervous background crew member suddenly ran out the door.

"As I was trying to say, what happened next Heph?"

"Well, now we had to go confront a giant, and get a magic piece of wood from his bloodstream."  Heph said.

"Then what happened?"

"Well, then I—"
"Oop, looks like we're out of time, folks. Stay tuned till next week when the reunion show comes back!"
*Dun-dun-dun-dun!*

Meanwhile, Vlad....

Had fainted, and the producer who gave false instructions was arrested.

"For heavens sake, stop that; we already bought the air time, and we're not airing commercials; now stop getting out of character and recap the story! This is very important to the new readers!" the producer said.

"Sorry about that; won't happen again.  Now then, Heph, you had to confront a giant; What happened next?"  Edogog asked

"Well, we had to confront the giant, but we hadn't any energy to confront it in the western fields.  So we went to a local tavern to grab a bite."

"And then what happened?" Edogog asked.

Just like the pied-piper led rats through the streets
Dance like the marionettes swaying to the symphony
Just like the pied-piper led rats through the streets
Dance like the marionettes swaying to the sympony
Swaying to the symphony of destruction


"I thought I told you to turn off the music!!"
"Sorry!"
"Now then, where were we?"

"We were in a tavern, instead of attacking a giant."

"Ah yes. What happened next?

"We had to find a vampire."

"Really?  Why?"

"To suck your blood!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Ah, very goot!"

Vlad licked his lips, and spotted Diesel 11, who had hired him, and he was still hungry.

But that got confusing, so we return to the reunion show.

"So what happened next?"

Well, a lot happened; Blad escaped from hell; we fought a giant, and so much more that we'll edit in on a later date because we need to move on with the story.

(We'll just edit it in later)

"Quite right folks; and we intend to start of the mid-season premier with a bang; so get ready here comes: it's worthy of a Michael Bay movie.

......

Vlad and his companion were planning there next move, to fulfill his quest to conquer the world, when suddenly they were surrounded by hellhounds.

"What? What is this?"  Was all Vlad could say, before him and his companion were sucked out of the bodies they took over, and dragged back down to the underworld by the hellhounds.  The couple, scared, ran off.

"What?  No! I escaped!"  He said.  He was confronted by King Minos at the gates.

"Welcome back Vlad" he said with a grin.

"Let me go at once!  It is my destiny to rule..."

"Nothing" Minos replied.

"What?"  He replied.

"Things have changed.  You see, your old friend Elmo struck a deal; In Exchange for his permanent entrapment here, so will you."

"I got out once; I can do it again!"  But when he turned around, a force field of some sort prevented him from leaving.

"Sorry; the contract is in place, those are the rules.  Just like how the dead can't return" Minos said.

In a climax worthy of some Michael Bay movie, giant chains formed around Vlad's neck and limbs, and dragged him down to the lowest circle.  He would try to move, but only succeeded in being stopped by a force field.

"Hope you like it Vlad; I arranged it just for you!"  Vlad looked over to see Elmo; laughing hysterically.

"I will have my revenge, so help me!!!" Vlad screamed.

Meanwhile on the surface, Heph and his allies continued with the quest.  They were up to...

No good.

"So, we're going to break into the castle of the most powerful king in the world to get some loot for our pirate buddies?" Eduardo moaned.

"There's also some powerful magic items that are rightfully mine, and some you'll need if that Vlad guy ever comes back." Noproe replied.

"All right..."

"All right, so what's the plan?"  Heph asked.

"First, we're going to sound off all our names for everyone who is here;  because I've lost track of who is in this party at this point" Noproe said.

"I'm Eli Zanzibar Lee, Captain of the Zanzibar Pirates, asked to help Heph on his quest by a mysterious woman..." said Eli, the first to speak up...